UFO

A flying saucer landed at a gas station on a lonely country road. The two space aliens inside seemed completely unconcerned about detection; in fact, the letters “UFO” were emblazoned in big, bold letters on one side of their shiny craft. As the station owner stood and gawked in silence, paralyzed with shock, his young blonde attendant nonchalantly filled up the tank and waved to the two aliens as they took off.

“Do you realize what just happened?” the station owner finally uttered.

“Yeah,” said the blonde attendant. “So?”

“Didn’t you see the space aliens in that vehicle?!”

“Yeah,” repeated the blonde attendant. “So?”

“Didn’t you see the letters ‘UFO’ on the side of that vehicle?!”

“Yeah,” repeated the blonde attendant. “So?”

“Don’t you know what ‘UFO’ means?!”

The blonde attendant rolled his eyes. “Good grief, boss! I’ve been

working here for six years. Of course I know what ‘UFO’ means

‘Unleaded Fuel Only.'”

(Author Unknown)

Jesus Is a Doberman

A burglar breaks into a house on the richer side of town. Certain that there is nobody home. He searches for the most likely place to find a safe and he enters. Just as he does, he hears a voice. “I can see you and Jesus can see you”.

He stops in his tracks and stays perfectly still. He doesn’t budge and waits for several minutes. The voice repeats, “I can see you and Jesus can see you.” He carefully takes out his flashlight and shines a ting beam around. He sees a birdcage and inside is a parrot. “Did you say that”?” he asks the parrot. The parrot says again, “I can see you and Jesus can see you”. “Hah! So what. You’re just a parrot”.

“I might be just a parrot” replies the bird, “But Jesus is a Doberman!”

(Author Unknown)