Raise the Dead

Pastor: “Now, for our healing prayers, please raise your left hand towards the direction of the altar.”

Old man: “How about the right hand pastor?”

Pastor: “Place your right hand on the part of your body that needs to be healed.

(OLD MAN TOUCHES HIS PRIVATE PART WITH HIS RIGHT HAND)

Pastor: “Sir, why are you touching your private part?”

Old man: “I just followed you command pastor!”

Pastor: “Yes I know. But this is to heal the sick. Not to raise the dead!”

(Author Unknown)

40 years of Marriage

A married couple in their early 60s are celebrating their 40th wedding anniversary in a quiet, romantic little restaurant.

Suddenly, a tiny yet beautiful fairy appeared on their table.

She said, ‘For being such an exemplary married couple and for being loving to each other for all this time, I will grant you each a wish.’

The wife answered, ‘Oh, I want to travel around the world with my darling husband.’

The fairy waved her magic wand and – poof! – two tickets for the Queen Mary II appeared in her hands.

The husband then thought for a moment:

‘Well, this is all very romantic, but an

opportunity like this will never come again. I’m

sorry my love, but my wish is to have a wife 30

years younger than me.’

The wife, and the fairy, were deeply disappointed, but a wish is a wish.!

So the fairy waved her magic wand and

poof!…

(The husband became 92 years old).

(Author Unknown)